Rhino Dung: Stinker of a Poser. (11 December, 1996)

The horn emerging from the head of the rhino is alleged to have a powerful aphrodisiac effect on men from the Far East. But what emerges from the rear end of the rhino seems to have had quite the opposite effect on Britain's men from the ministry.

Public servants in the Department of Customs and Excise appear to have been struck down by acute disorientation at the mere possibility that they might have to rule on the importation to the UK of less than 1 kg of rhino dung from Southern Africa. So, as public servants do, they've passed the buck, sorry, the dung, to the all-embracing Ministry of Agriculture, Fisheries and Food (Maff). The trouble arose when 23-year-old Vicky Myers, who is doing research in Southern Africa for her M Sc degree, wanted to bring a small sample of white rhino manure back to Hull University for analysis.

Ms Myers, who is working with game wardens and fellow scientists on the possibility of introducing the species to Namibia, hoped that detailed analysis of the droppings would give conservationists a more accurate idea of the white rhino's dietary inclinations. More specifically, according to Hull University, she wanted to establish whether the animal had any preferences for certain types of grasses which would help determine the most favourable habitats.

She planned to bring the unfragrant specimen back with her last month, but Customs and Excise grew wary. It was a scientific sample, they said, and referred the problem to the Maff. A further complication now arose. The dung could be defined as the product of an endangered species and, technically if nothing else, was on the banned list. Ms Myer's tutor at Hull, Mike Elliott, said: 'The first Maff person I spoke to thought I was joking.' The ministry is clearly in a quandary. A spokesman confirmed officials were still trying to determine 'what kind of licence' was required. There is obviously no entry under 'rhino, the faeces thereof' in the index of Maff's Manual of Import Licences. Foreign service. Courtesy of the Pretoria News.